This picture of a ‘Redneck Yard Swing’ sets the tone for this column.
It was sent to me by a fellow redneck (I know, I’m a country boy) and warrants passing along to my fellow brethren. If we can’t make fun of ourselves, then who can we make fun of? The Washington Redskins football team is currently wrestling with the name of their team and whether it’s racist or not. After reading this, they might want to change it to Redneck. Rednecks are all proud of who they are.
A Redneck passed away and left his entire estate to his beloved widow ... But she can't touch it 'til she's 14.
How do you know when you're staying in a Redneck motel? When you call the front desk and say, "I gotta leak in my sink, and the clerk replies ... "Go ahead."
Did you hear that they have raised the minimum drinking age for Rednecks to 32? It seems they want to keep alcohol out of the high schools.
Two reasons why it's so hard to solve a Redneck murder: 1) The DNA is all the same; 2) There are no dental records.
Who invented the toothbrush? A Redneck! (If it had been invented by anyone else, it would have been a teeth brush.)
Did you hear about the $3 million Redneck Lottery? The winner gets $3.00 a year for a million years.
A new Redneck law was just recently passed. When a couple gets divorced, they are STILL cousins.
Did you hear that the Redneck Governor's Mansion burned down? Yep ... Prit'near took out the whole trailer park. The library was a total loss too. Both books went poof ... up in flames. And the Governor hadn't even finished coloring one of them.
A State Trooper pulls over a pickup on Highway 16 and says to the driver, “Got any I..D.?” ... and the driver replies, “bout wut?”
That's all folks! Just share it with your fellow Rednecks.